No. 4 - Bringing Mindfulness into Daily Living
Informal mindfulness practice involves bringing your attention to the present as you go about your daily activities. The present moment awareness skills you develop in your formal mindfulness practice can be easily transferred into daily living. The benefit is that you engage in these daily tasks with full awareness. We often engage in tasks, particularly habitual mundane activities, with our attention directed elsewhere (on autopilot). Consider routine local travel such as driving to work. Often we arrive at our destination with no recollection of the sounds, smells, and sights along the journey because our attention has been absorbed in thinking or day-dreaming.
Bringing your present moment awareness skills into everyday living helps you to focus your attention on tasks you undertake do that you are less likely to make errors and get distracted. This increases your efficiency as go about your daily activities.
Bringing your attention to the present in your everyday living enables you to better understand your reactivity. That is, you become more aware of triggers and your automatic reactions to them. For example, you may notice that a person’s tone of voice and particular facial expression triggers anger and, in turn, you reactively speak crossly. Or a feeling of sadness triggers checking your social media to distract from the discomfort. When your attention is focused on the present, you are more likely to notice the trigger and your reaction and in this brief noticing you have a small window of opportunity to make a choice: behave reactively or choose a behaviour that is consistent with your values and sensitive to the present context. This is the difference between behaving like a reactive robot and behaving consciously; fully aware of your internal reactivity and your actions. Behaviour that is chosen based on full awareness of the present is likely to be more effective than automatic responding because it will better fit the context and be more reflective of personal values.
In regularly bringing your attention to the present in daily living you become increasingly aware of the continual ebb and flow of thoughts and feelings. In particular, you become more familiar with unwanted difficult thoughts and feelings and what triggers them, and you gain insights into the life experiences that may have shaped them. In becoming familiar with such patterns of thinking and feeling, you are less reactive to them when they arise. I illustrated this when describing my experience of silent trauma echoes in Chapter 25. Time after time an unwanted trauma-related feeling, thought and or image arises that I often recognise as familiar. Engaging my mindfulness and acceptance skills, I ‘eat’ the difficult experiencing. That is, I allow it to be present because it is and I tenderly envelop it with my awareness, and then I return my attention externally to functional reality.
Being more aware of the present in daily living, enables you to notice and savour pleasurable experiences that you would otherwise miss. For example, noticing a soft evening breeze gently waft the hairs on your skin and the sense of elation as you savour the experience. Present moment awareness can also intensify the pleasure you experience in enjoyable activities that you deliberately seek out. You will also be able to identify what triggers pleasurable feelings and sensations. Fully connecting with pleasurable experiences is part of the ‘feasting on life’ process that I described in my book, particularly in Chapter 26. Bringing to your attention to every minute detail of a pleasurable experience, heightens your awareness of it and enables savouring.
Below I have described several simple techniques that foster informal mindfulness skills. Although regularly practicing both formal and informal mindfulness is preferable, if you have intense adverse reactions to formal mindfulness practice or for some other reason you decide not to engage in it, you can simply practice informal mindfulness.
Remember:
Always notice the present with an attitude of gentle openness, compassion, curiosity and wonder. Be interested in the unfolding of life.
You cannot notice the present incorrectly.
When you connect to the present, you touch the dynamic life flow.
Checking In: I use this multiple times every day. Every so often, stop and notice for a few seconds what is going on NOW. Ask yourself where am I, what am I doing, what am I thinking, what am I feeling, RIGHT NOW. You can check in any time no matter what you are doing.
Turn to the breath: The breath is like an anchor – it helps to centre you in the present. The breath is always here. Every now and then, stop, and become aware of your breathing, even for just a few seconds.
Notice nature: Take time to notice nature around you mindfully; a tree, the clouds, a flower, water, grass, a bird, leaves rustling in the wind, shadows, sunlight etc. Feel the air, the cold, the warmth, a gentle whispering breeze.
One thing at a time: Doing one thing at a time enables you to focus your attention on the single task at hand rather than dividing it among numerous activities.
Five Senses: This is a simple structured exercise to help you connect with the present. I often engage in this exercise when I take my dog for his daily walk. Even though I walk the same route, when I engage in this exercise I am never board and I always discover new things. Practice it at least once a day.
Pause for a moment.
Notice one thing you can see and stay noticing it for about 5 seconds.
Notice one thing you can hear and stay noticing it for about 5 seconds.
Notice one thing you can physically feel and stay noticing it for about 5 seconds.
Notice one thing you can smell and stay noticing it for about 5 seconds.
Notice one thing you can taste and stay noticing it for about 5 seconds.
Connecting with a task in your daily routine: Pick an activity that’s part of your daily routine, such as brushing your teeth, washing the dishes, walking to the bus stop. When you engage in the chosen routine task, totally focus on what you are doing using your five senses. For example, if you selected teeth cleaning, when you’re brushing your teeth notice: the different sounds (e.g., of the brushing, the water), the pressure of the tooth brush bristles against your gums, the smell of the tooth paste, the taste of the tooth paste mixed with water and saliva, the tooth paste foam accumulate in your mouth and dribble down your chin, the movements of your arms and the tension in your fingers holding the tooth brush.
When distractions arise, notice them and gently return your attention to the activity.
I use all of these techniques in my everyday living. I hope they also help you connect with your life as it continually unfolds in the present!
- Kenneth Pakenham PhD